January 2015. A word of prophecy was given to me by a Pastor saying that around the same time of 2016, God will be answering my prayers.

Today is New Year's eve of 2015. And God has answered one of my prayers... Rye was able to buy a ring, and propose.

How Rye did it is a different story, for a different time. For now, I just want to focus on how I am feeling and to just take in everything that is happening. I don't want this to just pass by and be a blur. I want this to matter. I want to feel this. I want to be alive and just live in this. And there is only one way I know how -- to see God in all of these. I want Him to be the star in all these. I want to strip off the veils and just see the One who has really made all these things possible... and it's you, God. No one else but You. I know it's you. It's always been You behind all these, working for me and in me.

Right now, I can picture you Lord smiling at me. Like a scene in a movie, during a surprise party. You're behind the scene, but you're smiling while you watch me marvel at what is happening. A smile that says, "Yes dear, it's me. I did it. And I'm glad you liked it... I am not yet done." You're also smiling at me, as I realize my all my foolishness.

Dear God, life has always been about you. And that includes mine. I admit, I wasn't great the past couple of year. I am striving, fretting and worrying. And that is because I am selfish. I am only thinking about myself, and how I want to protect myself and to prevent myself from getting hurt or disappointed. But then again, my own life is not about me... it is about You.

Thank you God, because your your faithfulness and love is not based on my performance but on your nature. You answers prayers despite our shortcomings. Thank you because you did not let me become Abram in Genesis 16. He tried to take things in his own way, and "helped" You fulfill your promise. He became short-sighted and relied on his own strength and means to fulfill the promise. Thank you Lord, because you prevented me from doing that. 

When I finally let go and just gave you control, that is when you were able to fulfill your promise.

Lord, in all of these, help me to see You and your hand. Help me to never lose sight of what this season is all about. And as everything, that is You and your glory. It's not about the blessing but You and your purposes. I know you're not yet done yet. Your word is that you will fulfill all my innermost desires. And I am sure getting engaged is just the beginning!

I know God that you are up for the challenge. Help me Lord to be ready for this one crazy ride ahead.

I am your shield, your very great reward.
- Genesis 15:1

-- This post is originally from http://sacurativo.blogspot.com

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