No wonder my friends hated me..

Look at that! Ang martyr lang. Haha. Sabi nga nila, "Too nice.", to the point na nakakasuka na. And now I understand why.

Even after a year, I still can't believe how "mature" I handled this. Yes I am very proud. And I certainly don't regret my decisions. I think I can even count this as one of the highlights of my life. Because through during this "nightmare", I experienced the overwhelming Grace of Jesus.

Where else would I get that kind of resilience? Tingnan mo nga, I was able to send a smiley pa. Ang plastic ba? Haha. But no, that ain't being fake, but being composed. :)

Yes they deserved humiliation and all the mean word a woman can think of, but in my heart there is a still voice reminding me of how I too deserved condemnation for my sin, but was forgiven. And this is a time for me to practice everything I've learned about forgiveness, mercy, grace and unconditional love that I was taught since kids church, rather than a time to claim my right as "the legal wife" or something like that.

I admit there were outbursts of hate. If there's a voice of Jesus in my heart, there are screams of the enemy too. Up to now I can still remember the betrayal and I still have fears of being fooled again. (Lalo na may Timehop to remind!) Up to now I still can't understand why and how a person could recklessly mess up their own life. But again in my heart, a still small voice is saying that it's not for me to judge and each of us has a unique journey. I have to deliberately and consciously choose to listen to the voice of God and do what is right, rather than proving that I am right. It ain't easy, but I'm doing well so far. One day at a time.

I hope one day we can really clear up the air around us, as I proposed on this tweet a year ago.. Which amazingly has two RTs after I reposted it earlier. I didn't think it would make sense to others.

So there. One ago since God redeemed and rescued us from this mess. Thank you God. :)

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